Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Episode#20-The Search for Raoul's Pants

This is my personal favorite. It's not pointless, but it's all over and it's pure insanity. It's like bozo the clown threw up. But less happy and colorful and cheery and all that other crap that makes the world go 'round. Anyway enjoy my little readers. Feast your eyes upon the search for Raoul's pants.

Raoul-Thanks for coming shopping with me, Meg

Meg-Hey, you have a credit card and I followed. Can we stop at Hoilster later? And I want some Gouchi boots, and Armani made this new cute handbag, and Coach-

Raoul-Meg, shut up. We're going to Old Navy to find me some pants that fit.

Meg-WAHHHHHH(Runs away)

Raoul-MEG YOU CAN'T LEAVE!

Meg-WATCH ME

Raoul-No, I mean I have the car keys, you really can't leave.

Meg-Dang it!

(at old navy, raoul is checking out, simply piling on jeans to the desk without even trying them on or checking the size)

Raoul-Oooo. I like this, its very swishy and roomie like my hair

Meg-That's a skirt

Raoul-Oh

(lady rings him up)

Lady-Hand me your credit card sir

Raoul-Here you go

Lady-*sigh* you have it diamond studded?

Raoul-You know it!

Lady-*sigh* Sir, your credit card debt is too high. We can't let you pay for these. My screen is shows you have a balance of negative 12640 dollars in your account

Raoul-What!Wait a minu-Erik!

Meg-what happened?!!?

Raoul-The phantom's been using my credit card

Meg-haha.OOOOooo a breadstick!

Lady-Ma'am you have to pay for those

Meg-The viscount'll cover me

Raoul-eh?

Meg-Haha!I'm heading off to armani sucker!

Lady-Sir, to pay this off, you have to work her

Raoul-But that's servant stuff! I'm a freaking Vicomte!

Lady-Sorry, now go tell that large man he can't eat these small children mannequins.

Raoul-Nah-eh

Lady-*sarcastic* Uh-huh!

Raoul-ehhhhhhhhhh

(Meg comes in with a Butler carrying, like, 50 bags)

Raoul-Meg, what are you doing with all those bags?

Meg-Shopping

Raoul-How did you pay for all that shopping?!

Meg-Your credit cards

Raoul-WHAT!! WHY DID YOU USE MY CARD

Meg-Because you handed it to me after you said, oh no, the phantom's been using my credit card then you threw it behind you and I got it

Raoul-AAARRRRGGG MEG YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO CATCH IT (Raoul brings out a shot gun and shoots a mannequin then the lady at the desk)

Phantom-Whoa what happened here? Raoul you should be ashamed of yourself, killing people out of rage, why that's my thing!

Raoul-YOU USED MY CREDIT CAR, I WILL KILL YOU. YOU ALSO PUT ME DEBT I WILL oo my pants aren't tight anymore!

Meg-LOOK! LOOK LOOKY! BREADSTICKS ARE FALLING FROM THE SKY! LUKEY, COME LOOK AND COME AND EAT THEM WITH ME HOORAY BREADSTICKS

Phantom-Tsk tsk, Raoul. I can't believer you killed her and (eyes get wide) OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

Raoul-WHAT!??!!?!!

Phantom-When was the last time you went to the hair stylist?

Raoul-Last week!Why?

Phantom-You got the generic brazillion blowout didn't you

Raoul-What?bsh!no!bsh!what??

Phantom-You did!You did! You got the cheapy one Because-(purses lips leaving Raoul in suspense)

Raoul-WHAT!??!?!! WHATTTTT!!!

(In comes Christine)

Christine-Oh my God! I'm gonna hurl!*runs out*

Raoul-waahhhhhh

Phantom-...YOUR HAIR'S FRIZZING UP!!!HAHAHA

Raoul-Shu-ut uuuu-ppp!!

Meg- You lost your money, your hair, ergo all your looks. The only thing you haven't lost are those new pants. Are you sure their not too tight? They look-

***RIP***

Raoul-*bursts into tears*(his pants just exploded)

Phantom-(muffled laughter)

Meg-This just isn't his day

Hermione-C'mon guys, lets get out of here and leave him be.

Ron-What a git.

Raoul-*crying harder*I CAN'T EVEN UNDERSTANDDDDD YOOOUUU!

Ron-Hermione, Harry, what do people think I mean when I say git?

Hermione-Maybe they thing your calling them a cuss word

Harry-Or maybe they don't know what your saying (No crap Harry, that's only why he brought it up. Sorry,Meg Giry sarcasm. I'm addicted. Continue)

(Meg comes running in)

Meg-Hey Ron

Ron-Um, Hi

Meg-Here is my cell

Ron-ooookkkkk

Hermione-Um, Meg, RON IS MINE (Hermione slaps Meg)

Meg-Well at least my hair doesn't look like an ass's behind

Ron-(slaps Meg then punches, then Christine and Madame Giry come in and Christine is doing a dance while Giry cries)

Luke-MEEEGGG! you hurt my fiance you jerk hole!

Ron-whats a jerk hole?

Luke-Your mom

Ron-Really? that's the best you can do?

Luke-MEGGIE! MEGGIE, BABE, YOU ALRIGHT?

Meg-Oh yeah. Just peachy. JUST FREAKIN PEACHY. But ya know what? I'm not even gonna stoup to there level, cuz I HAVE THE BEST FREAKIN' HAIR IN THIS ROOM! YEAH, I SAID IT! cuz I'm blond, Christine's not.My hair's sleek and sexy and Her-my-own-niny's is as frizzy as Raoul's. And mom's...well do I have to go there?

MmeGiry-No. I know. It sucks monkey butt!

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