This is the climax for the first season, but not the last episode, plenty more where that came from. Hope you enjoy this episode, Christine and I worked very hard on it (and my brother came up with some) so its got the humor of an eight year old. ENJOY!
Voldemort-(Announcing to the city the latest news)People of Paris! Do not fear! The mass murder is being chased down below to the sewers by our greatest defense team, a viscount, a murderer, a jedi, a vampire, two wizards and a witch. A human, a prima donna and a ballerina. (to himself) we are screwed. (enters the opera house, this week closed to the public, he runs to the conference room, where Madame Giry, his wife, and their son, Bartholomew, the giraffe) Ma Belle! What are you doing here? Go back to the safety room!
MmeGiry-No! I have news, Edward found out what the monster is!
Voldemort-What Edward? What is it?
Edward-...A monster, like me. He is a newborn vampire, but this one is different and he is much more dangerous. He preys on...breadsticks
Voldemort-OH GOD NO!
MmeGiry-What will we do!Our poor baby and everyone here will die without our breadsticks...at least Meg and Luke are safe.Their in the mountains.
Voldemort-Aren't they coming home today?
MmeGiry-MEG!
Voldemort-Call for Erik and Raoul. They will find him. They will work together and kill him
***
Phantom-HE HAS CHRISTINE! HURRY RAOUL WE MUST RUN.
Raoul-Why?Christine doesn't love me
Phantom-If not for her, do it for the breadsticks
Raoul-(pulls sword from pocket, puts war paint on his face and runs)DOODLE DOO! FOR THE BREADSTICKS!
Phantom-Did he just use doodle doo as his battle cry>
(at the vampires crypt)
Raoul-This place is ugly!
Phantom-I like it.
Raoul-You would
Phantom-Shut up viscount or I'm going to stick your breadstick somewhere very painful
Raoul-Well then
S-(whimsical and haunting) Breadsticks...
Raoul-D-d-diiiidddd you hhhhhhear tttthatt?
S-breadsticks...
Phantom-Who are you?
S-(heavy breathing) I am the monster you were sent to destroy...man calls me...Smurfer..
Raoul-...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Smurfer-YOU FIND SOMETHING ENTERTAINING MORTAL FOOL?
Raoul-SMMURRRFEERR?!!? HYSTERICAL!...
(Luke joins the duet of men, then speaks into a walkie talkie)
Luke-No, they're still alive.
Raoul-Yea! You were sent to save us!
Luke-acctualy I was sent to bring back your corpses but... that works too(he draws out his lightsaber only to see a breadstick)aww crap. We're screwed. oooooo a breadstick!(nibble nibble)
Phantom-Way to send a good team Voldy!
Christine-Erik!Raoul! Are you there?Save me!
Raoul-Why is Christine always in danger. If we were ever in danger, she'd sit at home and eat breadsticks AND MILK MY GOAT!
Christine-ONE TIME! GEESH!
Raoul-Oh, well I'm going to sit down
(Luke is getting sucked by the vampire Smurfer when Meg comes in dressed in a ninja breadstick costume)
Meg-LUKEY!
Luke-Meg! Get out of here!...Wait save the breadsticks!
Smurfer-Lukey...Will be alive if...you give me the key to the breadstick vault at the opera house
Meg-Never!(Meg gets out forks and throws them at Smurfer) MAY THE FORKS BE WITH ME!
(Meg slays the vamp)Lukey,no don't die
Luke-I'm not dying that's the vamps blood
Meg-Oh, well I'm going to eat my breadstick dress
Christine-Will someone save me
Raoul-But your free of the vamp
Christine-I'm stuck on a AHHH THE VAMP HAD A BROTHER ERIK SAVE ME....AND EDWARD
Raoul-What about me
Christine-naa
Raoul-I come all the way to save you and you turn me down, well I'm going to eat Meg's dress with her
Meg-AHH NOT THERE YOU BEEP BEEP(Insert word of choice here)
El-YOU HAVE KILLED MY BROTHER. NOW YOU WILL DIE!
Meg-STATE YOUR NAME DEMON!
El-I was known by many names...I was born...Elmo-son
Raoul-HAHAHAHA DUDE! YOUR MOM HATED YOU GUYS
Elmo-son-(sniff sniff)
Christine-Raoul!
Meg-Mr. Elmo-son are you...crying?...
Elmo-son-ITS TRUE! SHE HATED ME! WAHHHHHHHHHH
Meg-Would you like a breadstick?
Elmo-son-(sniff) yes...
Meg-Too bad!(Meg slaps him with it and the room erupts with fire from all sides)
Luke-YOU COULDN'T JUST SHARE THE BREADSTICK!
Meg-I'M SORRY OKAY
Christine-RAOUL!
Raoul-YEAH?
Christine-I'M SORRY I MILKED YOUR GOAT!
Raoul-ITS OKAY
Christine-REALLY
Raoul-NO
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